Improperly Motivated -- Short Cummings Audio #52

It was spring again and my once disciplined lawn had forgotten all of the lessons I taught it last summer and had fallen into disarray. My orderly sea of green had become an unruly mess with tufts large enough to hide zebra-stalking lions.

So I mowed.

While the mower's snout growled and chewed its way through the grass, I pondered the eternal mysteries. Why are we born? Why do we die? Why weren't my teenage sons mowing?

Well, to be honest, the answer to that last one is pretty simple. Yard work isn't cool. Teens who voluntarily engage in household chores are about as common as Frat Boys campaigning for temperance.

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Want to get the rest of this or others like it? Check out the whole audio essay and related links at www.ShortCummingsAudio.com.

In this essay I do my best (which ain't especially good) to imitate the movie-trailer guy.  His actual name is Don LaFontaine, but he's also known as VOG (Voice of God).  You can visit his homepage here.

I also make references to the Toro company and Weedeater. No endorsement, just thought I'd give you the links in case you were interested.

Tags: humor essay | yard work | motivation | teenagers | griddlecakes